A month and a half ago I packed up a Uhaul and drove my dog, cat, and self back to the Columbia River Gorge. I gotta say, there is something about being in the cab of a Uhaul with your favorite furry critters and driving across state lines that is quite liberating. And also gives you time to convince yourself that you just may have diabetes because you have to stop to pee so much. I have had many times in my life where I have been in the cab of a truck with a cat or a dog and my belongings in tow. These little journeys are the highlights of an always emerging and changing journey.
Growth be hard.
Sometimes, I half ass wish that I could just be content with being stagnant… Being forever stuck and happy (and really believing that those two things could exist together). You know, be 55 years old, have a looney tunes tattoo, and just not care that all of my relationships are drama filled shitshows. But, unfortunately, I read more Brene Brown than I probably should and I become completely passionate about things like “personal growth” and “learning to not be an idiot.” I am a therapist after all.
And, we all all know that while hard (sometimes excruciating), growth, becoming, and deepening are exponentially rewarding. So much so, that I don’t even have much guilt/shame when I tell my friends that I am turning in early on a Saturday night to go take an epsom salt bath and read about metaphysics. Or that a hike to the top of a hill in Hood River where I can see two mountains at once (shout out to Mt. Hood & Adams! holla!) gets me all euphoric in a way that booze can’t rival, so I’m out for happy hour some nights.
But mostly, I am just working on laughing a lot.
I am living with my good friend until I can find a place that will accept me, the pooch and the cat. We have earned a bit of a rep with our friends for our, well let’s face it, nerdy existence. We get real excited about green smoothies and the farmers market. We have conversations on the way home from yoga about how it makes no sense that pizza and beer are allegedly bad for us because our bodies want them so bad. We talk about how it might be necessary to hide the amount of wine consumption from my roommate’s amazing and well intentioned but hardcore acupuncturist. Yes, life with a domestic life partner is pretty sweet! Our good friend (who is obviously blind with insane jealousy) calls us the “sister wives.” This started after we declined an invitation to happy hour because we were abstaining for health and invited her for dinner. Apparently a dinner sans ETOH, grains, dairy, and sugar was not very alluring. Just wait till she sees my DLP4Lyfe lower back tattoo on Monday. Hopefully my new hand sewn floor length high collar floral print dress will show it off. Eat your heart out Inked Magazine.
I have taken a new job as a therapist for a school based treatment center. It is pretty much the best job in the world if I do say so myself. At work we have rules like “No kissing people who aren’t family members” and “you have to ask before you give hugs.” A typical day includes a student projectile vomiting because he smelled another kids fart while trying to hug said gassy kid, or at the lunch table a little guy telling us he wore his grandma’s clothes last weekend. And then following that up with, “I had to because I pooped my pants.” I wish I was making this up. Everyday is magical and hilarious and sometimes makes you want to plunge your car into the Columbia River on the way home.
I am so grateful.